Okay.

I thought it would hurt a very long time, but now the pain is fading. It's still there, the pain, but it doesn't hurt that much anymore. The strange thing is that, i want to hate them. But i don't know why i can't.

"Wait for him to settle his problems." They say but, I don't think i want to wait. I don't want to be his dog or something. He left me, now its my turn to move on without feeling the regret. They made me felt so pathetic, but now i got my own pride to keep.

He asked me if Eric came back to me what would i do. I, too, don't know what i would do if he did. Would i take him back? Should i take him back? I don't know, but in my future, i see nothing but me being happy, i don't know what i'm happy about. But i'm sure the future will unfold itself.

My doubts about myself is never-endings, but the most exciting thing about myself is that i think of possiblities. Bad ones, good ones. I imagine them all the same. The possibilities are endless. And my life mission, is to try them out bit by bit.

Listener.

Listen. Listen to the cries of the world. Do you hear it?



They don't listen, or maybe they just don't know how to. Don't think, don't judge. Just listen. Push the noises away, those meaningless thoughts that ruin everything. Throw yourself aside, for once. Don't think about you. Instead, think of the person your listening to, what do you hear?



I hear the cry behind the swears. I see hidden tears behind wide smiles. When i look at myself...i hear someone screaming in anger and fustration. But, What i see is a typically happy girl. Liar.

softball

U gotta LOVE softball, to LOVE muaii!

To fellow softballers out there, HI! And to fellow fajarian softballers, We won riverside!!! And we are going to beat the shit out of RGS! Just incase you guys didn't hear me screaming at the top of my lungs at the last game, WE WON!!! Yippe! Wish us luck of our match on 23/4.

Love,

SERENA

Happiness

Happiness. Do you remember the last time you were truly happy? Whether it is sharing chocolate with your best friend, both of you sitting on a swing, talking about things you care about. Or be it talking on the phone with your crush all the way into the night and both of you talk loads of meaningless crap. But its the little things that make us happy. Isn't it?

I remember the once, when i was about in kindergarden, i was waiting for my parents to pick my sister and i up. I remember the teachers were waiting for them with us. We were the last ones there. My parents were suppose to bring us to Swensen's to celebrate my birthday. We waited so long that i thought that they weren't coming, somehow i felt fear, i feared that my parents will never come to fetch us leaving us there standing in the cold.

Then i saw the old car my dad drived and my heart beat began to spring up. I could hear my heart beat banging in my ears. I tiped-toed to see if i had mistaken the car. But as soon as i saw that super curly black hair of my mum, i just jumped as high as i could making sure they saw us.

My dad pressed the horn to signal us to get in the car, and i sprinted towards them thinking of how i could ever doubt them. I felt so happy, because i felt that i truly belonged to something. That when i fall, i know someone will catch me. That person wouldn't let me fall, ever.

Thought no 2. Chocolate

Chocolate, the very thing that almost everyone have in common. I mean can you image a world with NO chocolate?? Hell would let loose! Everyone would look grumpy and be nasty all the time because, well, they just simply don't know what is happiness anymore. When you take away chocolate, you take away the delightful smiles of little children. Chocolate is a glimpse of heaven.

Can you remember? When you were a kid, remember those days when you stood out side a candy store looking for the biggest, most delicious looking caramel-milk chocolate that cause more than the entire year of your pocket money add together? Can you remember your first bite of the very first chocolate that you have ever tasted? The little thud of chocolate cracking up in your mouth, the most terribly wonderful feeling you get when the chocolate begins to melt in your mouth, the exact moment when the sweetness starts to set in and you ask yourself, how is it possible that something so insignificant can taste so good. Then when the feeling starts to fade and your taste buds begins to crave for more and you take your second bite. Now, this time it doesn't taste the same, this time you'll feel the excitement, somehow, its like waiting for santa at night and you can't sleep. Almost like you are on the highest, most absoulutely fearful looking roller-coaster in a carnival. When you reached the top and you start fall down, and down to what seems like the end of your ten year old life... ...

Well, my point is that very bite of a chocolate taste different. Some may taste like you at your first day in school; the uncertainty and excitement. Others may taste like your first kiss. The most sweetest feeling you can get. It makes you think, life couldn't get any better than this.

And so my dear readers, may you never forget your first bite of a chocolate. It's little things like this that really makes life worth while.

Thought no. 1

To my dear readers out there, this is my first blog entry this year. I hope that someone is reading. Okay, by the way, my thought for the day, Why are we never free? You know, we are never really allowed to do what we wanted to do in our entire life. Can you image the possiblities? If we were allowed to do whatever we wanted to do, Could there be no junkies? No more Drug addicts, no more people comitting suicide. Because all these society 'failures' , as the goverment call them, all they ever wanted was not to be judged. They do the things they do because of the society's pressure. their peers, their teachers, all these people in their life has an affect, to their lives. Of course, the have a choice to look at it on a positive way, or otherwise.

But give some thought to it, we can do whatever we wanted to do. It's just wheather you believe that you can. All we ever wanted to do, to find... is something that truly belongs to yourself. Something that truly fits you, that you thoroughly understand like the back of your hand. Something that is you.